Simply the Best

“What an incredible day the first-ever Drain Games has been! We’ve seen all sorts of plumbing techniques on display, some incredible and smart tradies, and best of all, everyone had fun. But now, as the day draws to a close, it’s time to announce our winner. Who will be crowned the best plumber in Victoria? I think I know who it might be…”

A tingle raced through me. I’d taken first place in every event except for professional and quick drain cleaning service. Melbourne residents deserve thoroughly cleaned drains, so I just couldn’t bring myself to rush it. Even still, I was the clear front runner for first place. The bookies had me at $1.01 to win. After all this time, I was finally going to prove that I was the best plumber Melbourne had to offer.

My master thought I couldn’t do it. Now, I’d return to him a journey-woman with proof that his teachings had rubbed off on me. His lack of support throughout the years had been tough, but I’d always been driven by my desire to prove him wrong. He thought I’d fluked it all those years ago when I won Who Wants to Be A Plumbing Millionaire. He couldn’t claim as much this time.

The MC began to open up the envelope to read the winner. His mouth dropped open slightly, as he said, “I don’t believe it. Our winner is Riley O’Neal, the man who knows how to fix blocked drains around Fairfield better than anyone!”

The crowd was silent. I struggled to hold back tears. How could I have lost, after everything I’d done today? Maybe my master was right, after all.

“Oh no!” the MC said, “it appears I’ve opened the wrong envelope! Sorry Mr O’Neal, but you are not the winner. Of course, the real winner of the first-ever Drain Games is Steph Jennings! Formerly known as the best female plumber in Melbourne, but now, simply the best.”

My heart flowed with joy. I’d done it! As I went to accept my plumbing crown, all I could think was, take that Master Luigi!